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Amabanga 10 yo kugarura umunezero mu rukundo - IGIHE Burundi
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Accueil > Imibano > Urukundo > Amabanga 10 yo kugarura umunezero mu rukundo

Amabanga 10 yo kugarura umunezero mu rukundo

vendredi 1er Ntwarante 2013

Mbega urukundo rwanyu rurakomeye? Urabona ko muruhurijeko? Aho ntiwoba wipfuza kubivamwo?Inyishu si ukubivamwo ahubwo itosore wongere utosore umukunzi wawe, mwese musuzumane, mumenye neza ikibazo kihari mugitorere inyishu mubandanye urukundo rwanyu mutikekana.

Raba neza ibintu icumi bishobora kugufasha kugarura umunezero mu rukundo:

1. Nimwongere muze murarondera umwanya wo kuganira bihagije

Kenshi usanga abantu bakundana batagira umwanya uhagije wo kuganira canke bariko baraganira umwe akiharira ijambo, ucusanga urukundo rudakomera kandi ugasanga mugenzi wawe afise ico yavuga canke yakubaza ariko ntumuhe umwanya ,ivyo bikosore vyica urukundo’

Akarorero, nimba hari aho wipfuza kuja kandi ukaba wumva vyogushimisha ujyanye n’uwo wihebeye, mubaze nimba nawe abishaka kandi ubimusabe hakiri kare kugira ngo nawe umuhe umwanya wo kuvyiyumvira ko. Nimba kandi akubwiye ikosa urifise vyemere umusigurire neza azorushiriza ho kunezerwa.

2.Wosanga mubana canke mumaze igihe kinini mu kundana mutaridondorana neza?

Guhera uyu munsi gerageza ufate umwanya uhagije wo kumenyana
Kwidondorana neza bituma umenya ivyo uwo ukunda yanka nivyo akunda hama ukamenya ingene witwara kugira ngo umunezereze kuko burya mu guhura kw’abakundana ntibaba bazinanye bamenyana iyo bibwiranye neza.

kindi uriko wibwira umukunzi wawe gerageza umubwire ukuri utamwiyorobekako kuko bizotuma niyabona ko ukuri wamubwiye kudakwiye bizomuca intege murukundo.

Hariho abanka kuvuga ingeso zitari nziza bafise yamara uzimubwiye agukunda mwofadikanya kuzitorera umuti hanyuma urukundo rukabandanya.

3. Mbe aho ntiwikunda cane, ukigungirako wenyene, ukumva utuntu twose wotwihariza?

Gerageza Kugirira no kugaragariza ubuntu umukunzi wawe.
Ubuntu hano buvugwa ntabwo ari ubujanye n’ibintu bifatika gusa, ahubwo bivuga ko umukunda nkuko wikunze ikiza cose utokwiyima nawe nyene uto kimwima, ukamwitaho ukamutonesha imbere yawe.

4.Hari igihe wosanga guca bugufiya no kubaha uwukunda bikugora kandi biri mubikomeza urukundo.

Burya umuntu ukunda, uzi neza ko nawe agukunda, akamurutisha abantu bose, ugera aho wumva umwisanzuyeko , iyo utavyitwayemo neza, canke ngo ubicungire hafi, haragera aho umwihoza (ukamusuzugura) ku buryo usigara ari we utubaha mu bantu bose.

Ni vyiza rero gukomeza kwitwararika umukunzi wawe n’aho mwoba mumaranye igihe kinini cane.

Si vyiza kumva ko mwamenyeranye cane ngo utangure kwigenza nk’uko umenga ntaco akikubwiye, canke ngo umubwire ivyo wiboneye byose.

5 Kwifuzwa nuwo ukunda canke kwifuza uwo ukunda mukitwararika guhana umwanya wo kuba muri kumwe navyo Bizana umunezero murukundo

Ni ngombwa gufata umwanya kandi uhagije w’umukunzi wawe. Si Vyiza kuri ba bantu bakunda kuraba za ama sinema canke imipira y’amaguru cane, bagateba mu bunywero , ku buryo bibagirwa cankese babura n’umwanya w’abakunzi babo.
Niba kandi utashye uvuye ku kazi, ugeze muhira gerageza guha umwanya abo uhasanze, utandukanye akazi no muhira.

Muri iki gihe kubera ubuhinga bwa none, abantu benshi ntibakibona umwanya ukwiye bagenera abo mu rugo; n’iyo batashe bavuye ku kazi bigumira ku nyabwonko kuri za facebook n’ibindi bishobora kubatwara umwanya bakibagira abo batashe basanga. Yamara ibi si vyiza na gato kuko umukunzi (umugore/umugabo) wawe aba agukeneye kandi akurindiriye.

6. Kwama mureshanya

Kuvuga gutyo ntibivuze gusubira muvyo mwarenganye gusa uba usabwa ko uwo ukunda wama umubwira amajambo meza ya nzogutetesha, nzokubera umurinzi, nugwa nzokuvyura, sinzoguhararuka n’ibindi . Bene ivyo vyongera kwama mwishimiranye mu rukundo.

Burya si vyiza ku bagore bamwe na bamwe, bagera mu rugo bagatangura kwikoresha turya na turiya, ntibiteho abagabo ku buryo usanga abagabo babo baba basigaye basa n’aho banafise isoni zo gusohokana nabo, rimwe na rimwe ugasanga bibaye n’intandaro yo kubaca inyuma.

Niba uri mu rugo n’umukunzi wawe, ba wiyitaho, ube usa neza, wereke umukunzi wawe ko umukunda kandi ko ukiri mwiza kugira ngo azokwame abona ko yatomboye kuko atawundi musa.

Mu rukundo bawibuka ko utari nk’umuntu uraba isinema gusa, ko ahubwo uri umukinnyi wayo kandi rurangiranwa, gutyo umenye ko ugomba gukora uko ushoboye kose ngo uruvomere.

7. Mu bibangamira urukundo kenshi harimwo kutizerana, none aho wari uziko iyo utizera umukunzi wawe uba usa n’uriko umuha n’inguvu zo kuguca inyuma?!

Birashoboka ko ibi woba warabisubiriwemwo kenshi ntuvyumve, ariko menya ko ata rukundo, canke urugo rushobora gutera imbere mu gihe atakwizerana hagati y’abakundana.

Ikindi kandi niba hari ikibazo muhuye naco mu rukundo rwanyu, ntukagifate nk’aho ari iherezo rya vyose kuko ntibishoboka ko uba mu rukundo rutigera na rimwe rugira ibibazo, n’iyo vyaba ata gukekeranya haba hariho ikindi kibazo utazi canke utarabona.

8. Nimugerageze kurondera umugambi mukorera hamwe

Ni vyiza ko mu rukundo mugira umugambi, waba ari muto canke munini mu korera hamwe kuko bibafasha kwegerana no gushira hamwe. Ntiwirirwe wiyunvira birebire kuko umugambi si itegeko ko uba ikintu kinini gusa, ushobora kuba urugendo uru canke ruriya mutegurana, gutegekanya imvyaro no kuzorera umwana n’ibindi.

9.Kwihererana n’uwo ukunda

Umuntu wese aba akeneye igihe co kuba ari kumwe n’umukunzi wiwe gusa, ata wundi muntu aza kubabangamira, ni vyiza cane! Birashoboka kandi ko hari n’ikindi gihe aba yumva akeneye kuba ari wenyene, akiga wenyene, akiga n’umukunzi wiwe, agasubira mu twandiko twa kera yandikiranira n’abagenzi biwe, canke mu tundi tuntu twose yoba yarakunda kera ubu atakironkera umwanya.

10. Kugira umukunzi ntibivuze kwambikwa amapingu, gerageza kwigenga

Kuba ufise umukunzi kandi ukunda cane, ntibivuze kumwirundamwo ngo wumve ko atahari ubuzima buba buhageze canke ko ataco wokwimarira.

Si vyiza kumva ko ari we akugize, kuko ibi bikugirira ingaruka mbi mu gihe mutakiri kumwe canke hari ikindi kitagenze neza, kuko kenshi ubuzima budateguza.
Ni vyiza ko umwe wese akomeza kuba uwo yari imbere y’uko muhura, kuko umwe wese afise akarangamutima kiwiwe kandi ntikibuza ko mukundana .

Ni byiza kandi ko hari gahunda ukomeza kugira ku giti cawe, nko gusohokana n’incuti zawe, gusangira nazo, kuzitumira mu rugo, kuja kwoga (piscine), kwiga umuziki, gutamba n’ibindi bidasaba uruhara rwiwe .

Uramukunda cane, ariko ntabwo ari vyose muri vyose, hari ubundi buzima ukeneye kubamwo uko uvyumva bipfa kuba gusa bitamubangamiye. Gusa uvyitwaramwo neza kandi nturenze kuko n’iyo mugize ubuzima butandukanye cane kandi mubana na vyo bishobora kubagora ndetse bikaba bishobora kuba intandaro yo gutandukana. Ibi bizobafasha kugira urukundo ruryoshye, rutagira udusembwa kandi ruzomara igihe kirekire ruri itoto.


Joel Sengurebe

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